April 22, 2017

by - 9:41 PM

I'm not sure when I officially hit my motherhood rock bottom. It could have been when I handed over a french fry and said "here, try this." Or maybe that time when he couldn't push his walker over the grooved tile, and I told him adversity is good for him. Actually, it's probably when I said to Ryan that the baby was acting like a total asshole.

You guys, this is a judgement free zone.

But whatever the bottom may be, I take it all back now. Sometime this week, a million and one gears clicked into place and we started sleeping all night long. Maybe a 3am snack here or there, but we're talking one wake up a night -- tops. And it is a miracle on par with those blood weeping Mary statues in the Vatican. It will knock your freakin' socks off what a single night of completed REM cycles - let alone four or five - will do for a gal and her little baby boy.

And I don't want to take credit or anything, but JFC, I have been telling him since September 13th how much better he'll feel if he just went the eff to sleep. Only seven months and I get my first "told you so."


Anyway, we had the BEST Easter weekend. Duke slept at night every night and woke up all kinds of well rested. He proceeded to spend the rest of his day laughing. I mean, I'm serious. The Easter Bunny straight up put a different baby in my basket this year.

So, the boo-hoo thing about Ryan having a job these days is Ryan having a job. Duke and I road tripped solo on Friday afternoon and for three hours, that little turkey kept himself busy babbling away and taking a little cat nap here and there. We made a Grand Rapids pit-stop so I could hang with my best friends on Friday night and Duke could test out a baby swing (loved it, obviously. It's the only piece of baby furniture we don't have, so it's for sure the holy grail piece), then on Saturday, cruised the rest of the way to good old Olivet for Easter with Ryan's side of the fam. No big deal, just another day of Duke on his best behavior, playing independently like a boss. Must be that 80 degree weather on the lake.


Sunday, he slept another full night and I am telling you, I saw Jesus.

This weekend was so needed. I'm sure I don't need to tell you that I love my son, but we were going on weeks of sleep deprivation and I think we both saw the men in white coats coming for us. Just last week, I scooped up this book and it has been amazing. You know why? Because in the mix of all the blogosphere moms with white walls and pinteresty open kitchen shelves, and plenty of time to go on date nights with their husband and shop for organic produce and go on 47 target runs a week that makes me roll my eyes straight to China, there's the rest of us, just trying to survive until tomorrow. Crossing our fingers through every sleep regression and tooth eruption. Practicing the cry it out method on ourselves, while we let our babies cry it out for five entire minutes. Drinking that decaf, even though you could really do a truck load of caffeine, because that baby is a breastfed baby and he doesn't need a single drip-drop anything that might maybe keep him even more awake than he manages to keep himself.

This book is full of those regular moms, and for all the "extra" I thought I'd be, I'm not. I'm rockin' the same sleep deprived top knot on the daily, repeating my mantra that the higher the top knot, the closer to God. I'm part of the 99%.


Oh, and you guessed it - I've literally been writing this post for a week. Lucky thing getting my shit together wasn't this years New Year's Resolution.

Happy weekending!

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