32 Weeks

by - 8:19 PM

First thing - let's address this -- the third trimester is officially the "all bets are off" part of pregnancy. I am weeks behind on this (and maybe just updating a few numbers to say 32 instead of 31 even though I mostly wrote this last week, because what the hell) and maybe I don't even mind.

But I will. I know I will. Once I have this baby and my energy is back to normal, I will mind exponentially, so here we go. I will have my memories.


You guys, why are weekends so short? Monday through Friday is exactly 37 days long, and then we get fifteen hour weekends. I'm not making that up -- that's fact. I decided to make some cookies for breakfast, and when I looked up from the mixing bowl, it was four in the afternoon.

In other news, Ryan's been gone for pretty much two weeks and it's lucky that we're mostly done with that because I am done being a good wife and leaving him alone. I am ready for that guy to be home. I miss him and Georgie has been acting up like a crazy dog and I'm not much for discipline. Ryan keeps reminding me that I need to get my shit together in that department if I don't want to raise a criminal or an asshole. I mean, I'll work on it. 

Anyway, case in point. He peed in my house like three times this weekend --- get this -- when I was in the room. This is not about his bladder. He's pissed that his dad abandoned him. Also, he elected to randomly chew things up. Things that are not food, things that should not attract his attention, things that are on counters. Although, he did destroy the bill for the property taxes, and I totally patted his head and gave him a treat. 

Good dog. 

The point is, we're all ready to see the boss back at home, disciplining the dogs and snuggling the wife. 

Onward -- it was baby shower week!

How far along? 32 weeks.
Total weight gain: 38lbs. I feel enormous and north of my knees is cellulite city. 
Maternity Clothes? Yes, but even those are getting snug. For the first time in my life, I'm really over clothes. Shoes not so much, but clothes? Yeah, I'd go naked if it weren't so shamed in our culture. 
Stretch marks? Not yetttt. But this is funny -- I've had some chicken pox scars on my stomach since the second grade. Just tiny little bumps, no big right? Well, one is the size of a dime now. A DIME!
Sleep: More please. Third trimester exhaustion is a real thing, and on Saturday, I literally slept all day long. I took a few awake breaks to eat, but then it was back to bed. 
Best moment this week: Discovering Outshine coconut popsicles. No seriously, that was the best. Also, I had two baby showers this weekend, which I will write about someday, and they were amazing. Chocolate cake for the lady with the baby. 
Miss anything? Alcohol. Judge me. 
Movement: Baby Hodges is getting fierce in there. I feel movement pretty constantly, even if I don't think he's actually awake. Turns and kicks and whatnot. 
Food cravings: This week has been steak + popsicles for every meal. I mean, every meal. 
Anything making you queasy or sick? Nope  -- feeling good!
Labor signs: Just those braxton hicks, which aren't really uncomfortable, just sort of there. 
Symptoms: I'm really really really tired. And at my baby shower, I cried over a card because it had words in it. 
Belly button in or out? Out. 
Rings on or off? Off. Sometimes I'll wear my engagement ring, if it's not humid or hot and I haven't eaten three hot dogs for dinner the night before. But only then which is not often. 
Happy or moody? I feel so bitchtastic right now. I mean mugged the shit out of the lady in front of me in the 12-items-or-less check out lane the other day. She had exactly 42 things. I mean, everyone else can count to 12, but I guess the rules didn't apply to her or something.

And then there was the lady who openly, publicly and verbally judged my purchase of diet caffeine free pepsi, which by the way, is no longer made with aspartame. She says to me, "you drink that, even though you're pregnant? Doesn't it hurt the baby?"

And I was like, "not more than the booze."

Eff off lady.

Looking forward to: You know, delivery. I'm trying to be grateful that I feel good and I'm still really mobile and that I'm not totally over pregnancy yet, but I'm sick of being hot all the time and wearing the same rotation of ten dresses and not being able to drink or eat what I want. I'm also really looking forward to my belly button returning to its rightful, internal location.

Also, more interesting. Ryan and I are going on our baby moon this weekend. My birthday is on Monday, so it felt like the perfect time to take a really long weekend and go somewhere, just the two of us, for the last time for a long time.

Happy Tuesday Guys!

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  1. Even after baby is born make sure you try to take a weekend here and there for just you two, it will help your marriage, and save (some) of your sanity