February 25, 2019

by - 5:57 AM

Hey guys. If you don't know, I hate January, February and March. Like, Christmas finishes up and I put away the lights and ornaments and pull my "fuck everything" attitude out of storage. I go into it knowing that it's going to suck and I just have to get through it. It's like exam week in college. Just, you know, prepare as much as you can, and live through it. The cute cozy hygge thing has worn off and I just want to open some windows and not wear socks all the time.

And as a side note, I'm 30 years old. I am in control of my life. One morning last week, I was driving by memory rather than visibility through yet another snow storm and I thought, why the eff do I live here? Maybe I could just move. I won't, because my "take action" resolution isn't that strong, but it's nice to remember that I could.

Anyway, I'm existing through the three stupidest months of the year. Suffering from a touch of seasonal depression, but February is almost over and March can show up with a few nice days, so there's light at the end of the tunnel.

If you're interested, here's how I've been spending the last few weeks.

***

My washer broke. "No biggie," said Ryan as he clicked the overnight shipping option on a new water pump. Eight days later, UPS finally delivered. To his credit, there was a massive series of snowstorms that would .  not . quit, but also, he refuses to drive down our private drive unless it's 70 and sunny, so basically I stop ordering from Amazon between November and May.

So much laundry, guys. I just caught up this morning and that is not a joke. We went for like, a week and a half without a machine. I wore jeans that didn't fit before I had a baby. Duke was wearing pajamas day and night because he only owns three pairs of boo-geens. Ryan had to temporarily put his obsession with only wearing socks that reek of bleach on hold.

***

Duke has been driving me banana crackers. I'm going to say that two is a very trying age, but much like winter, I'm optimistic that things will get better, eventually. And unlike winter, all this is coupled with really good tight hugs, unsolicited kisses, and excitedly jumping up and down when I pull in the driveway, so there are shiny silver linings. 

Let's see though, let's start with the memories I'll smile at fondly when I'm old (I think/hope). This weekend, he yelled at me that he needed to poop, so I scooped that turkey up and plopped him on the toilet. Great, this is exactly what we want, but somehow, he already understands shame and wants to be left alone to poop, so he tells me to "go-way, Mommy!" That's fair enough, so I walked away. When he shouted that he was all done, I came back to find my sweet angel, still perched on the toilet, clutching a fully unraveled roll of toilet paper.

A hour or so later, he emptied the contents of our vacuum reservoir on the rug, and this morning, he smeared his poop on my bedspread.

I know it sounds like he's got a lot of unsupervised time to be doing these things, but seriously, if I sneeze, my eyes close for a millisecond and that's all he needs to scramble up the kitchen table and punt a lit candle across the dining room. RIP to my rug, by the way.

***

Had a little gals weekend to celebrate my mother-in-law's birthday last weekend. A hiccup kept my SIL Sara home, which was a total bummer, but it was still a fun couple of days checking out a local winery and distillery that are literally within 10miles of my house, but I've never gone to.

Also, yoga. My other sister in law (Ry has a lot of sisters) is a yoga instructor in Frankfort and she tricked me with some really relaxing breathing stuff that turned into trying to hold myself up on sweaty palms. My forearms are still a little sore.


***

Listen, March is coming. I know it's 98% going to be snowy as hell, but usually, we get a few peeks of 50 degrees and that is what's keeping me going. But just to help things along, I also invested in a Yeti mug, these J.Crew slippers that are almost too pretty to wear (but I totally am), and a Netflix subscription.

Please send your endorphins.

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